Columns

The lives of most mentally ill people are not filled with glitz and glamor, nor do we live lives of ease and abundance. This is unless we have one or more benefactors in the family willing to shower wealth on us.

Unfortunately, many persons with mental illness fall through the cracks of a broken treatment system, they may become incarcerated or homeless, and/or they could die prematurely from any of numerous causes. This has become normalized, and it should not be normalized.

Persons with mental illness have a shortened expectancy due to the health risks of psychiatric treatment. Some have shorter lives due to poor self-care, and some fall prey to suicide. Thus, a long, happy, and healthy life is often the exception and not the rule.

The above describes the reality that mentally ill people have it hard enough. When disabled and accepting treatment, many of us can not perform well enough at a job to last at one. The expectations of a job are often too steep. It is harder for us to show up for work every day than it is for someone who does not have the limitations of a disability and of mind-restricting drugs.

The expectation that we should be employed should be non-applicable for many of us--those of us whose cases are severe enough that we must be heavily medicated. Yet, if we are capable of employment, we should be encouraged in this. It is a fine line between trying to be encouraging, versus applying undue pressure. 

When a mentally ill person can get well, we may be able to navigate the treatment and government benefits systems so that things are at least tolerable. 

The biggest single hurdle is that of having the insight that we have a serious psychiatric condition that requires treatment. Once we can get past that, it still isn't easy. 

If we have only Social Security and/or SSI to live on, we cannot afford living expenses in the San Francisco East Bay. This could mean we have to live in vastly substandard housing. If we can obtain a housing voucher through HUD, living under their requirements is often anxiety-producing. 

Both Social Security and HUD periodically examine beneficiaries to make sure we are not living in the lap of luxury while bogusly obtaining government benefits. This is not to say that we are ungrateful. This is to point out that it feels like restriction and intimidation when government needs their evidence--that we need the money and housing, and that we are not faking anything. 

Additionally, it is currently harder to get anything accomplished with government agencies, since they are all shut down to the public due to the virus. If we can't conduct business remotely, we are out of luck. 

Middle class, well-off people do not have much understanding or tolerance of poor disabled people, and often regard us as scum. We aren't. We would gladly trade places with them, socioeconomically speaking, if we had a practicable, genuine opportunity to do so. 

COVID-19 hasn't made life easier. Although I have a computer system that I have nursed along well beyond its life expectancy, other people with mental illness may not have a computer or may not know how to use Zoom or Skype to connect with people. Not being good with internet makes life much harder. Internet makes it possible to do many things remotely that would otherwise require transportation. This gap in cyber knowledge creates the need to go out in public more often, entailing rides on public transportation, causing increased vulnerability to COVID-19. 

Poverty is everywhere. I feel fortunate that I have food, shelter, clothing, communications, and transportation. Many persons with mental illness have none of this. These are the basics, and many mentally ill do not have them. 

Many, not all, persons with mental illness do not have the skills needed to live independently. When I say 'independently' I am not referring to earning our living, I am referring to people who do not depend on social service agencies and/or the mental health treatment system to act as our guardians, supervisors, caretakers and/or decision makers. 

I handle my money, my housing, my bills, my rent, my utilities and so on. I shower, shave, brush and floss when needed, and I make my decisions concerning health care. That’s about as independent as it gets for those of us who can't work while in treatment. Some can. At one time, I did. I had to quit because it was becoming too difficult, and because people kept coming after me--maybe they were envious; I don't really know. 

I am also a writer. This, in many people's thinking, is probably out of the question for a person with my background of being mentally ill, being medicated, and the whole package deal. 

Now I'm older, and most employment won't work because my job skills are more than twenty years out of date. Medication and age prevent me from doing a grunt job, and I haven't created a career in which I would be in a supervisory position. Some people still try to harass or attack me now and then, but it is not as bad as it was. 

The happenings in our government, irrespective of which side you are on, can inspire a lot of paranoia to people already susceptible to that. In these days of COVID-19, the difficulties of living with mental illness are made harder. 

The combination of COVID-19 and political unrest means that falling through the cracks is even more likely than it once was. These are times in which mentally ill people must be brave.